Embracing New Beginnings: The Courage to Create Our Own Families

Embracing New Beginnings: The Courage to Create Our Own Families

Navigating the unexpected journey of motherhood to my sister's surprise twin babies has been an emotional odyssey, marked by profound love, steep challenges, and unanticipated growth. Fourteen months ago, I stepped into a role I never anticipated, becoming a beacon of stability in the midst of chaos, as my sister battles the grip of addiction. With the absence of my parents and having long been the family's black sheep—questioning societal norms and rejecting fear-based beliefs for a more inclusive, loving understanding of the universe—the responsibility fell solely on my shoulders. This journey has thrust me into the depths of government systems, often feeling like an uphill battle, yet I remain at the starting point with a profound sense of privilege and gratitude. My family, both given and chosen, has become my anchor, and this platform has given me a voice, a space to share, to connect, and to advocate for the change my city so desperately needs. Sarnia, with its rich legacy and potential for growth, faces critical challenges that demand attention and action, especially from those in positions of leadership. As I navigate this complex role, balancing my devotion to breaking cycles with a deep appreciation for traditional values, I'm driven by a vision for a community that embraces change while honouring its roots. My story, soon to be fully shared, is a testament to resilience, love, and the relentless pursuit of justice—a call to listen, to act, and to heal. I have nothing to hide if it will help my community. Happy Family Day, however you choose to celebrate!

As the sun rises over Sarnia, Ontario, it brings with it the promise of new beginnings and the opportunity for us to redefine what family means. In the quiet reflection of early morning, I'm reminded of the complex journey many of us have navigated—myself included—towards understanding, acceptance, and, ultimately, healing. The concept of family, especially in the aftermath of recognizing my own role in a cycle of toxicity, has evolved for me, as it may have for many of you.

Breaking Cycles, Building Futures

For too long, some of us have lived under the shadow of cycles we inherited but never questioned. It wasn't until I saw the impact of these cycles on my own adult children that I realized the depth of change needed. It's a hard pill to swallow, acknowledging that despite our best intentions, we may have unwittingly perpetuated a legacy of hurt. But it's also a powerful first step towards healing and making things right, particularly for those of us stepping into the role of raising our grandchildren.

What Does It Mean to Be "Woke"?

In our community, the term "woke" has been tossed around, sometimes with disdain, even mocked by public figures like city councillors. But at its heart, being "woke" is about awakening to the realities around us—it's recognizing the need for change and being mindful of the impact of our actions on others, particularly those who have been marginalized. For retirees and others who might be puzzled by this term, understand it's not about political correctness; it's about compassion, empathy, and the willingness to learn and grow.

The Vital Role of Matriarchy

Now, more than ever, the principles of matriarchy and maternal wisdom are crucial. Matriarchy isn't just about women leading; it's about fostering a society that values nurture, empathy, and communal responsibility. It's about understanding that decisions affecting the family and community should be made with a focus on the wellbeing of all, not just the few. When did we move away from these values? It's time we reclaim them, using our voices and our wisdom to guide the younger generations.

Making Your Own Family

For those of us who have come to realize the importance of breaking harmful cycles, there's a profound beauty in the ability to choose our family. Creating a family isn't always about blood relations; it's about building connections with those who support, understand, and love us for who we truly are. It's about offering a safe haven for our grandchildren, showing them a world of understanding and acceptance that perhaps we didn't fully comprehend until now.

Accountability and Forgiveness

As we navigate this journey, it's essential to take accountability for our past mistakes. This process isn't about self-blame but about acknowledging our actions and their impacts. It's a step towards forgiveness—of ourselves and others—and towards building a healthier, more supportive family dynamic.


As we look towards the future, let's remember the strength found in vulnerability, the wisdom in reflection, and the power of creating our own families based on love, respect, and mutual growth. Let us be the matriarchs and patriarchs who lead with empathy, embrace change, and foster a community where every individual feels valued and heard.

Let's create a legacy of love, understanding, and resilience for our grandchildren and for generations to come.


Back to blog

Leave a comment

Please note, comments need to be approved before they are published.